


NicoB vs Everybody On The Plane

by orphan_account



Category: NicoB (Youtube)
Genre: Crack Crossover, Gen, Intentionally Bad Spelling & Grammar
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2015-07-26
Updated: 2015-07-26
Packaged: 2018-04-11 07:23:16
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 786
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/4426484
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/orphan_account/pseuds/orphan_account
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>nicob woke up on a plane, 15 mins late. w/ starbucks<br/>actually don't read this</p>
            </blockquote>





	NicoB vs Everybody On The Plane

**Author's Note:**

> I'm sorry. NicoB plz forgive me.

NicoB woke up, and very softly with a lot of feeling he said: “what the fruity fuck?”  
He was in a plane, there was a black man, his skin isn’t even black??? Like what the fuck it’s actually a dark brown??? Anyways the man was just intensely glaring at a snake. Ok, fine, be that way,  
Anyways. Nicob realized his hand was really warm?? “?!!!!?!?!?!” nicob looked at hgis hand, “holy shit”. It was starbucks. He actually excppeced a bagel, but honestly bagels aren’t even that good???  
Like seriously bagels are kind of disgusting, unless they’re Shirleys Bagels, like after prom I was sick and eating a bagel and I almost chocked because I could only breathe out my mouth and this fucker in his tuxedo was just staring at me, like ok let me die u piece of shit whos probably a virgin uwu.  
Anyways BACK ON TOPIC!!!! Nico looked at the attendant who was fuckin glaring at him “um can I help you?” nico asked. The attendant had some fuckin white cotton candy rachet ass hair. :/ “Um,” NicoB read his name tag, “Naegi Makoto Recolor No2”  
“UM… IT READS GOTOUCHMYD, BAGELFUCKER69, NAHI’MGAYTHO ” Komaeda Nagito said, like the little fucker he was. “AND THE PIOLET. IS KINDA PISSED, BECAUSE U HELD OUR PLANE BACK 15 MINS JUST SO YOU COULD ARRIVE W/ STARBUCKS…”  
If this fanfiction was logical, NicoB would be questioning his sanity, wondering if he was having a hallucination, or just knowing this entriere situation was bullshit. But he fuckin wasn’t,,, god dammit nico. But he isn’t so he’s just gonna go along w/ it ok uwu  
Anyways komeda gave nico his peanuts and totally-not-a-porn magazine. Despite Nico protesting he ws alalergic to them?? Like fuck u ko  
Nico, knowing this was kinda fuckin weird :( nico decided to talk to one of the ppl next to him a little prissy bitch named Joshua (that’s just the American version,,, like what the fuck whitewashing RACIST TTRANSLATIORS!!!!)  
Actually I’m a translator, and let me tell u, it’s fuckin pain in the ass… like holy shity jk I’m not a translator I’m actually a proofreader abd let me tell u seriously stop Japanese language uwu  
Anyuwas, nico tried to start the conversation with like a 14 yr old when he’s like 27??? Ew. (he’s probably 26 unless I’m wrong)…  
“um what are you looking at peasent?” Joshua asked, prissy hoe  
“um what are you looking at prissy fuckface?” nico asked back. Flipping the little fucker off  
“I asked u first” Joshua played with his hair,  
“I asked u second” nico moved his neck in a sassy way (u go gurl, I’m rooting for u)  
“I’m yoshiya kiyrururururruurururururkuzuyuuuuu, but because that’s Japanese my names Joshua but the readers already knew that lmao”  
“oh I’m NicoB”  
“Nico B. What??”  
“just nicob”  
“…” ok don’t be a little shit and stop internally judging  
“fuck u” Joshua said, even tho it was nicos turn to talk, and he shoved nico’s starbucks ALL OVER HIS NEW SLAM SHOES  
Everybody got up, and monokuma appeared out of the floorboards to slam Joshua out of the plane hahaha no flight Joshua..  
“ok so now who do I meet” goddammit nico, uir getting to used to this  
“hey whats up, I’m horny.” Said a mysterious voice.  
“Hinata?! Sigma?! Junpei?!” Nico turned around dramatically. Now who was this?!?!!??!!?  
“no my names kazuhiko... I don’t appear in jackshit, and I’m only here so the author can shamelessly self advertise their upcoming visual novel.”  
“wow I should play it” nico said, emotionlessly  
Thanks nico (:  
Anyways, the REAL HORNY TRIO APPEARED, ONE WITH FUGLY CLOTHES, ONE WITH WEIRD HAIR, AND ANOTHER WITH ROBOT BODY PARTS HERE TO SAVE THE DAY… with penguin shirts ah yeah.  
Hinata Punched junko, Junpei punched ace, and sigma did that weird time traveling thing so he could punch dio and immediately turned back into the present so he could punch nico.  
“OW! WHAT THE FUCK!” nico cried,,, “FUCK U!”  
Nico tried to punch the old man, but now that I think about it’s that’s kinda fucked up too so nico ascciedntellay punched himself, in the glasses…  
“Big Bro?” nanako cried, “No fighting!” as she moved her arms in that cute little justice hero way. Everything was obliterated by her pure cuteness. Thanks nanako.  
And at the end of the day, in his bathtub full of money (in his mansion)… Togami suddenly jumped. Putting on some $999.99 dollar store mask (that looked pretty cheap tbh) and stood up only in his boxers made out of dollars.  
“There has been a great disturbance…” He muttered, pushing his mask up like his glasses, but fucking up and poked his eye whoopsie daisy.  
Next chapter: nanako vs togami

**Author's Note:**

> there is no next chapter unless i feel like it.


End file.
